


Intoxicating

by FallinForAGuyFellDownFromTheSky



Category: Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: Bottom Black Hat, Comedy, Flug tops (yes really), M/M, Marijuana, Paperhat - Freeform, Passionate Sex, Recreational Drug Use, Sex, sex while high
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-20 02:06:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17013525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallinForAGuyFellDownFromTheSky/pseuds/FallinForAGuyFellDownFromTheSky
Summary: Black Hat would sometimes get high with his subordinates.Demencia smoked when she pleased, Flug joined her when he had the time, and once in a blue moon Black Hat would join them.Who knew it would lead to sex?As requested by robofennec...I think they're the ones who asked for soft passionate high-on-weed paperhat smut.





	Intoxicating

**Author's Note:**

  * For [staghooves](https://archiveofourown.org/users/staghooves/gifts).



Black Hat would sometimes get high with his subordinates.

 

Yeah, I bet no one ever thought  _ that  _ would be a thing that happens.

 

It wasn’t as if it was a common occurrence. Demencia had a guy, and it quieted her down for a few hours. Black Hat saw no reason to stop her, as it never interfered with anyone’s work. If anything, it prevented her from getting in the way. It had a calming effect on her, kept her docile. She enjoyed the high and smoked fairly often. Not everyday, not enough for it to become an issue, but enough that everyone got a small reprieve of her mad antics and could work in relative peace.

Flug didn’t smoke as often. It helped him sleep, and encouraged him to actually eat something. So, Black Hat saw no reason to stop him either. Flug was always responsible, he never got high before finishing a project and  _ never  _ while working. It was something like a celebratory high, something he did once he was sure he had no other responsibilities to tend to and nothing else that needed his attention. He tried to keep it from the bear, for reasons Black Hat didn’t fully understand or care about. But, so long as he only did it to recharge himself for the next round of deadlines and sleepless nights running on caffeine and protein bars, Black Hat didn’t see a problem. Humans needed rest, and Black Hat, in a rare instance of pity, allowed him this.

They got high together sometimes. Demencia smoked when she pleased, Flug joined her when he had the time, and the two of them got along better than any time spent sober. Usually doing nothing but watching late-night television and messily snacking until they passed out.

 

And, once in a blue moon, Black Hat would join them.

 

They’d tried hiding it at first. Well, Flug had. He damn near jumped out of the window when Black Hat walked in on the two of them, sharing a bowl of popcorn and watching infomercials. Demencia didn’t really care, might’ve been too high to care, but Flug had been so afraid to have been caught. Then completely stupefied when the eldritch picked the joint out of his hands, took a long drag, and said “Not bad. A few more and I might actually feel something.”

 

Black Hat had done his share of drugs. Usually the harder stuff. The things humans came up with that just rotted the body away faster than any natural substance. Marijuana was nothing new, and wouldn’t interfere as much as other substances. Didn’t have as many lasting effects. Similar to Demencia, it calmed him down. Made him a bit lethargic. And relaxed him to the point that Flug and Demencia’s presence wasn’t so grating. Even when getting trail mix on himself and the couch, he didn’t much care anymore. He felt fine. Little things like that, which he’d usually fuss over endlessly, just didn’t matter so much.

Until the next morning, when he looked on the scene with disgust and ordered the bear to clean it up.

 

And one instance, after Demencia had knocked out and was laying on the floor, leaving only the two men to enjoy their inebriated company, he let something slip.

 

“It didn’t even occur to me you might  _ have  _ a sexuality.” Flug said in a bamboozled voice.

“Well, I do.” He murmured. “Now you know.”

“So is that why you never respond to Demencia flirting with you?”

“Yeah.”

“Does she know?”

“Doubt it.”

“Maybe you should tell her you’re gay. She might leave you be.”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Black Hat asked with a lazy grin. “This way, she just keeps coming back for more no matter what I do.”

 

Flug sputtered out some wet laughter. “You are so fucked up.”

“Hey, we all like to feel wanted.” Black Hat felt his eye slip shut for a few seconds longer than normal. Sigh. Sleepy. These were the rare times he slept. He felt nice. Oh his posture was terrible, he was laid back with his lower half not even on the couch anymore. His knees pressed against the coffee table awkwardly and his head was nearly touching the couch cushions. His hat was kind of falling in his face. His neck and back would be killing him in the morning. But, he didn’t have to worry about that quite yet.

“Yeeeeeah.” Flug drawled out. “I’d love to.”

“Huh?” Love to...what exactly?

“Feel wanted. That’d be greeeeat.”

 

Black Hat haphazardly flung an arm in Flug’s direction. He was about 80% sure that he hit him. Not quite what he’d been trying to do, but close enough.

 

“Ow! Why’d you hit me, boss?!”

“You are wanted.” He mumbled.

“I mean, like, the way Demencia wants you. That kind of wanted.”

“Oh. I see.”

 

So, logically, the most appropriate thing for Black Hat to do in this scenario would be to flop his way over to Flug, climb on top of him (amidst his slurred protests of “What? Huh? What’re you doing? Boss?”), accidentally rip his paper bag a bit trying to pull it up, and press a sloppy kiss to his chapped lips, right?

Well, apparently not, if Flug’s wide-eyed stare was anything to go by.

 

“S...Sir?”

 

Black Hat felt himself sober up a bit, as the implications of what he’d done sunk in with him. And he realized that maybe he shouldn’t have done that.

He slid down the man’s body, landing on his knees on the floor. “Sorry, sorry....Didn’t mean to....I just...sorry...”

“No, uh, that’s ok.” Flug said, his eyes as big as dinner plates behind those goggles. His small pink tongue darted out to lick his lips. “R-Really.”

“I guess we better call it a night.” Black Hat slowly got to his feet. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Flug remained on the couch, as if frozen. “We, we better.”

“Good night Flug,” Black Hat wobbled his way out of the living room, trying not to trip over Demencia.

“Good night sir.”

 

-

 

The next day, Black Hat did the most rational thing and pretended nothing had transpired between them. Business as usual, just another day in the lives of evildoers. If he just acted like nothing happened, things would go back to normal. It worked, for the most part. Until, late in the day during one of the last few rounds Black Hat would make, when the two found themselves alone in the lab and Dr. Flug decided that things needed to be addressed. For some reason.

 

“Uh, sir?” He’d nervously spoken up as Black Hat was on the way out.

“What is it Doctor?”

“I, er,” Flug pulled his long rubber gloves off and twiddled his fingers. “Last night, when you...kissed me, well, why exactly did you do that?”

“Because I was high and not thinking clearly.” Black Hat growled at him.

“Ah, yes, o-of course, sir.”

“Now, if you’re done wasting time, get back to work.”

“Yes sir! Right away sir!” He obediently squeaked.

 

Things returned to normal easily enough. Though Black Hat refrained from joining his underlings in smoking for longer than usual. More than had become the norm. Nearly a year, in fact. He just...felt some distance was required for things to remain the way they were. Just some time away to forget the feel of the mortal on his mouth. It seemed so much more vivid than his other memories. Like the weed had seared it into his mind. When he finally did rejoin them they eased back in to the usual swing of things. Only Demencia mentioned how long it had been, with some flirty remark which went completely ignored. Black Hat may have noticed Flug looking away and mumbling something. He didn’t ask him about it, and things were fine.

Until Demencia again slipped into sleep early and left them on their own.

 

“Uh, Boss?”

“Hm?” Black Hat was sprawled out on the opposite side of the couch from where Flug slumped, his feet in the mans lap.

“I have something to tell you.”

“What?”

“I’m gay.”

“Me too.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Mmm hmm.” Black Hat wasn't fully coherent enough for that statement to sink in just yet. He was about ready for a nap.

“So,”

“Huh?” What?

“Would you, uh, would you want to kiss me again?”

 

Well, he was awake. “Huh?”

 

Dr. Flug crawled on top of him hastily and pulled up his paper bag, exposing his lips. He smashed their mouths together hard, rushed and sloppily. Black Hat reached up and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him closer and reciprocating with full ferocity.

When they parted, the man was panting heavily above him.

 

“I’ve been thinking about doing about that for months.”

“I thought...” Black Hat stared up at him,  _ his  _ eyes blown wide for a change. “I thought you didn’t like that I kissed you.”

“I was surprised. I mean, I barely find out you’re gay too and you go and kiss me? I thought you might’ve just been high, like you said, but, god, please tell me you’ve been so distant this past year because you felt something too.”

“Yeah, I, I’ve thinking about it too.” He admitted. “But I thought-”

“Well stop it.” Flug kissed him again, the two of them moving against each other on the couch while Demencia drooled underneath them and kicked her leg out.

 

“Uh, m-maybe we shouldn’t do this here?” Flug sputtered, breaking the kiss.

“Yeah ok,” Black Hat snapped his fingers and the two of them fell in a heap to the floor of the bedroom.

“Ah!” Flug got up on his hands and knees “Couldn’t you have teleported us to the bed?”

“Hey, just be glad we made it to my room.”

“Uhhh, this is  _ my  _ room.”

“Is it?” Black Hat propped himself up on his elbows and confirmed that this was in fact Flug’s room. “Ah, it is. Damn. My bed is bigger. Let me try again.”

“No no no no,” Flug crawled on top of him again. “We don’t need you snapping your fingers and accidentally destroying half of everything in the universe trying to get us in bed. Here is fine.”

“I can’t even  _ do  _ that.”

“I’m not risking it.”

 

Flug helped Black Hat get to his feet and then the two of them immediately collapsed onto his bed. Everything was a haze of stripping and yanking and even shredding when certain articles of clothing just refused to come off.

 

“So, like, are you gonna keep the hat on?”

“Aren’t you gonna keep the bag on?”

“No,” Flug pulled it off, exposing his face and it’s many burn marks. “Why would I keep the bag on?”

“Damn it, why’d you do that? Now I  _ have  _ to take the hat off.”

“Wait, did you really think I was gonna keep it on during sex?” Flug asked. “We, we are having sex right? Like, that’s why we’re here?”

“Well duh.” Black Hat lightly smacked his face.

“Why would I have kept the bag on?” He asked again, as if it really was so unthinkable. “That’s just weird. It’d get all damp and muggy and soggy on my head. Then I’d have sweaty bag paper stuck to my head. I don’t want that.”

“Would you shut up?”

“Take the damn hat off.”

 

Black Hat removed the top hat. Flug removed the bowler. And the fedora. And the pork pie hat. And the boater. And the kepi. And the trilby. And the bucket hat. And the homburg hat. And the fez. And past that he couldn’t stop laughing.

 

“You’re, you’re like a goddamn Russian nesting doll of hats!” Flug said, furiously taking more hats off. “How are you even wearing all of these? How does a cowboy hat fit under a chupalla?”

“Look, we’re gonna be here all night if you keep trying to do this.” Black Hat said flatly as the beret was flicked off. Followed by the panama hat.

“...Is that a motherfucking trucker hat?”

“I was going through a phase, shut up.” He pouted. He took it off and revealed the flat cap underneath.

Flug continued pulling off hats. And just barely managed to speak in between all his laughing. “Do you, like, not take your hats off when you get a new one or something!?”

“...No?”

Flug stared at him. And covered his face as he completely broke down. “Ok, you need to put the top hat back on, I can’t take you seriously in that.”

“What’s wrong with the cloche?”

“That’s a womans hat.”

“Fuck you, I embrace hats of all makes.”

“Put your top hat back on.  _ Without  _ putting on all the others, please.”

 

Black Hat rolled his eye but complied. He had to admit, his head felt a bit lighter now. He removed his monocle as well, and then they were both naked in bed. Save for the hats.

 

“I hope you don’t think the top hat means I’m topping.”

“Wait...” Flug squinted his eyes like he was trying to figure out a particularly complex math problem. “You mean... _ I _ get to top?”

“Unless it turns out you suck at it, yeah.” Black Hat leaned back and got comfortable. “You have lube, right?”

“Uhhhhhhhhhh, yeah.” Flug scrambled around for the bottle, eventually pulling out from under the bed. “I really didn’t expect this today.”

“Ehhhh, you do good on your feet.” Black Hat spread his legs a bit. “Unless you do better on your back, get to it.”

Flug got his fingers nice and moist and penetrated his hole slowly. “Only if you’re up to riding me.”

“MMmm,” Black Hat whimpered. No, he was good here. After only a few minutes of tentative finger-fucking he was panting heavily and trying to move his body to get Flug to go deeper.

 

“Holy fucking shit,”

“Shut your damn mouth.” Black Hat said through labored breaths.

“No it’s just, holy fucking shit. Either I’m blazed out of my mind and having an insane sex dream or I’m literally about to fuck my demon boss. Is this actually happening?”

Black Hat sat up and grabbed Flug by the hair. He kissed him hard and yanked him on top of him.

 

“Ok, this is actually happening.” He whispered. “Holy fucking shit.”

“Fuck me now,”

 

Flug certainly didn’t need to be told twice.

He spread the lube along his length and went in slow. Oh God, how long had it been since Black Hat had been fucked while high? Had he ever actually done this while intoxicated before? Top or bottom? He couldn’t remember. All he could think of was the way it felt having Flug moving gently within him. Every inch felt so deep inside his body, like it was hitting places he didn’t even know he had. Was Flug even going slowly? Did it just feel this way because of the weed? Was it slowing everything down so he felt every little motion of his hips and the head of his cock rubbing that one spot inside him that drove him to arch and keen pierce the sheets with his claws? He felt the both of them rocking softly on cheap bed sheets, which probably didn’t compare in the slightest to the satin of the demon’s own but now could pass for Egyptian cotton to him.

 

“Oh, sir,” Flug breathed out on top of him. “Oh my god, you feel amazing.”

He could only whimper in response. Both of his eyes were shut tight, burying him in the ecstacy of the moment. His own body moved forward, eager to have Flug deeper inside him. His legs wrapped around the lean torso of the human man, encouraging him to push further.

“Can, can I move you?” He asked, cautiously lifting the ashen thighs.

“G-Go ahead,” He responded, already out of breath. “Just, just keep going. Keep going.”

 

Flug lifted the demon’s legs up past his shoulders, leaning down to bend him nearly in half and press passionate kisses to his gasping mouth. He moaned shamelessly and ripped at the sheets. It was so soft but so intense. He wasn’t sure he’d ever felt this way, even when getting furiously pounded he hadn’t been able to revel in each thrust to his core like this.

Black Hat shakily moved one his hands down and started pumping himself slowly. He wanted to go hard and fast but also wanted to savor these moments and let them drag on and on and enjoy it for however long it lasted. His other arm wrapped around Flug, encouraging the mortal to give him more. He could barely speak above a breathy chant of “Yes, yes please, more, ah, ah, like that, yes, yes.”

 

How long had it been? A few minutes? You could’ve told him he’d been getting fucked for hours and he’d been inclined to believe it. His voice was soft but high and dripping with need. Singing sweet tones to encourage the doctor to keep at it. Pleading when he can’t stop himself. Flug was so deep inside him, connecting them so tightly, again and again and again with that gentle rhythm slowly pushing Black Hat over the edge.

He cries out the mortal man’s name as he cums, clenching around him and lightly piercing the skin of his back. Flug groans out from the sensation of being so embraced and spilling himself inside.

 

Then he pulls out and falls next to him, the both of their chests heaving. Flug slings and arm around Black Hat, and slips into sleep soon after. The demon was not far behind, fading into unconsciousness at the sight of his scientists adorable sleeping face nestled into the pillows beside him. The burn scars a beautiful explosion across his glistening face.

Had he really been this cute the entire time?

 

The next morning, Black Hat was the first to awaken. He promptly shoved Flug’s arm off of him and got out of bed. Flug groggily woke up as Black Hat dressed. The events of last night returning slowly.

 

“Oh, good morni...sir? Sir why....? G...good...morning? Sir?”

“Good morning, Flug.” He replied as if this was totally normal. Oh no this was not normal. Oh no what was Flug going to think of this? He better not think he’s in for any sort of “special treatment” because of last night.

“S-So, uh...” He nervously wrung his hands together. “How, How did you sleep?”

“Fine.”

“Oh, good. Me too.”

Black Hat rolled his eyes. Well, obviously.

 

“Mmmmm Hmmm. Yep. Good. I slept good.”

 

He scoffed. What was up with him? Did he really need to say it?

 

“Uh, sir?”

“What is it?” He hissed.

“W-Well, uh, about last night, I-”

“Doctor, I will only tell you this once; You are never to speak of last night. Never bring it up or reference it from this moment forward again.”

“Oh, of course sir!” Flug gave an odd little salute. “B-But, if I may ask-”

“Out with it you sniveling worm!”

“I was wondering, uh...h-how was it for you?”

 

Black Hat eyed him with such a blatantly annoyed look. “You seriously have to ask me that?”

“Oh, uh-” Flug was silenced by two of Black Hat’s bare fingers covering his lips tenderly.

The monster moved his fingers back to cup Flug’s cheek correctly, as he pressed a sudden kiss to the dry cracking skin. “You may just be the best I’ve ever had.”

 

He called over his shoulder as he strolled off into the shadows. “Perhaps we should do it again sometime to confirm.”


End file.
